The Day I Started Painting Again

It has been 14 years already and I miss painting. I used to paint in the confines of our library when I was younger--to relieve me of the stresses in the world. Painting proved to be really therapeutic. Nobody need tell you what to do or towards which direction your brush strokes should go. I was in a somewhat different world everytime I painted.

Now to find the subject to paint--I mostly painted abstract and flowers before; but I wanted to venture out into real-life objects, places and people. My first experiment was with Boch. He said that the painting looks a lot like him--but he's a bit uncomfortable with the dead fish near his foot.

My Article on adventist.ph

I recently joined a training on Video Production for Hope Channel Philippines with chosen media volunteers. The training was held in the South Philippine Union Conference's Hope Channel Office in Cagayan de Oro, or what they referred to as the City of Golden Friendship. Click here to read my article, which talked about the events that occurred on one specific day of the training.

Giving God Your Best

This devotional article touched me--it made me realize that in all my days of living, I have mostly thought my life was about me, about people whom I've known and loved. In my case, I have sometimes left God out of the picture and underestimated His power to change my life for the better. I mostly relied on myself thinking that I know the best way to make myself happy--and this was to do anything I wanted and achieve for myself everything I've hoped for.

I always forget that even in the minutest of all decisions, God wants to be involved. He is my Father; and He has always intended to give me His best love. I hope to be able to give my best to Him, too.

This is from the devotional Experiencing God Day-by-Day, by Dr. Richard Blackaby; dated 8 August 2009:

Giving God Your Best

You shall not sacrifice to the LORD your God a bull or sheep which has any blemish or defect, for that is an abomination to the LORD your God. (Deuteronomy 17:1)

God’s love moved Him to sacrifice that which meant the most to Him—His only Son. Our response, if we truly understand His love for us, is the desire to give back to God that which means the most to us.

The Old Testament reveals that God set forth high standards for the sacrifices He required of His people. A worthy sacrifice had to cost the people something. As their hearts shifted away from God, the people began struggling to give God costly offerings. They would bring blind, lame, and sick animals, assuming God could not tell the difference (Mal. 1:8). God saw what they were doing and declared their offerings to be in vain (Mal. 1:10). Throughout the Old Testament period, God was setting the stage for the ultimate, perfect, and sinless sacrifice of His Son for the sins of humanity.

The offerings we give back to God reveal our hearts’ condition. A heart that overflows with gratitude for God’s love will respond in selfless devotion. If we are unwilling to sacrifice our time, our possessions, our money, or our energy, we indicate that we do not love God as He desires. God takes delight in the person who gives to Him cheerfully out of a loving heart, a person who understands that God is the source of everything he has and who knows that God will more than compensate for whatever is sacrificed for Him (2 Cor. 9:8).

If you struggle in giving your best offerings to God, pause and reflect on what God sacrificed for you. Trust Him and give Him the best that you have because you love Him with all your heart.

I hope you were blessed... I was, and still am.

Random Thoughts

I admire intellectual people--and sometimes envy them. They seem to have all the time in the world to read up on current events, philosophical ideologies, and other materials of depth. Other times, it is just natural for these sages to blurt out ideas at the top of their head that easily merit ordinary people's applause.

And yet, I also find it unpleasant to always think things through and lose the child-like bout within you. I, for one, wish to hold on as long as I can to my "childhood". I still want to be able to play with my stuffed toys, be naturally curious about trivial matters, do baby talk--to generally maintain the innocence and idealism I once was accustomed to. I long for the shallow times when I can just laugh out loud and people find it cute, when I spill ice cream on my shirt and not think that it's disgusting, when I just go out with my girlfriends and skate, all of us in a straight line, without neighbors and on-lookers finding it corny.

I want to enjoy the simple life; but I want to grow. Little by little, it is dawning upon me that there's always two sides to a story; more commonly explained in these words "with great knowledge comes great responsibility".

With increased education, you get to see a specific situation from another perspective and you learn how to do things more easily. But before taking the first step to pursuing a solution, a sage inevitably thinks deeply through the issue, since it is not only the ingredients in the recipe that he considers, but the whole concoction.

My question: How exactly does one live the simple life without being simple-minded? I'm not exactly sure if I want to know the answer to this--'cause it just might make my life complicated... or not.

Things to Remember

My boyfriend has been secretly crushing on me since May 2007. He doesn't want to admit it, but I have proof... from his own blog. :) Sweet and stalker-ish. I'm keeping these for blackmailing purposes. Haha.

Posted on 19 May 2007

Iced Tea

I know a girl
She puts the color inside of my world
She’s just like a maze
Where all of the walls all continually change
And I’ve done all I can
To stand on her steps with my heart in my hands
Now I’m starting to see
Maybe it’s got nothing to do with me

© 2003 John Mayer, Daughters

Posted on 26 October 2008

Secret Gardens

A professor of mine, one of the very few whom I admired throughout my college years, has reminded us a few times to take life a little more seriously. She said that life is not a game, neither is it a joke. That if we continue to see it as such, it would later turn out that life itself is the one that's going to play a joke on us.
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I've been reading her journal. The one that's supposed to spill a few of her secrets yet is on the public domain. Truth be told, it was an accident that led me to her writings. I would never have intended to read it had I known that it was not for my consumption.

Her words showed a side of her that I haven't really seen for the few years that we've known each other. Or maybe I just didn't know her as well as I think I did.

She is in love. In fact, so much in love.

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My soul does not know how to fight for what it feels -- for what it longs for. It is a knight without armor and it will remain as such until the summer heat begins to melt the coldness of its heart once again.

Posted on 12 November 2008

Non-Fiction

There are some things I wish I've learned directly from a person, said right in my face -- a far cry from learning these things through something written down in hypertext. There's nothing like witnessing uncompromising honesty, hearing the words I'd rather hear than overhear, and have the opportunity to express my own heartfelt relief in return. A relief from not having me guess -- from not letting you pick up pieces of somehow an unresolvable puzzle. After all, I'm not that sensitive.

There are some things I wish I've said directly in front of somebody. Even though it was killing me at the time, I still should have held back until it was the right time, should have waited until we were at the right moment. Even though it makes little difference to how the receiver feels about me, at least the hundred-night of constant well-wishing, passion, and suffering would have shown in my eyes. The shaking of my hands would have revealed how nervous I still can be from doing something I've rehearsed all my life. After all, she is worth it. She was worth it.

Find Hope Again

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Venue: Dusit Thani Hotel, Makati City
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My Article in Collegiate Quarterly

Collegiate Quarterly, a quarterly devotional for young adults, published my article for its Oct-Dec 2008 issue. This material is translated into a number of foreign languages including Spanish and Portuguese and is used by Adventists all over the world.

Check out page 88, or 7/9 of this link. Enjoy!